Tuesday 23 March 2010

How to have a number 1 - the KLF way


Excellent music blog Loudat has posted the KLF's legendary 'Manual'.

Subtitled 'How to have a number one the easy way' it is an absolute gem. Comic, serious, full of bile and useful advice, here's just a taster of the text:

"Firstly, you must be skint and on the dole. Anybody with a proper job
or tied up with full time education will not have the time to devote
to see it through. Also, being on the dole gives you a clearer
perspective on how much of society is run. If you are already a
musician stop playing your instrument. Even better, sell the junk. It
will become clearer later on but just take our word for it for the
time being. Sitting around tinkering with the Portastudio or musical
gear (either ancient or modern) just complicates and distracts you
from the main objective. Even worse than being a musician is being a
musician in a band. Real bands never get to Number One - unless they
are puppets."


The book also comes with a guarantee that if you follow the advice to the letter and don't have a number one hit, they will refund the cover price. If you follow the instructions and DO have a number one, the KLF will take you for a night out in Madagascar.

Excellent stuff.

Here it is.

And here's a reminder of the wonderfully f*cked-up chart topper that inspired the book:

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